Articles by Tom Esch

Waking Up in the Wake of the Racial Unrest

This is mostly my personal reflections on current events. I hope my thoughts inspire you to speak up respectfully about what you believe, with an open heart to listen to others who have different ideas from you. We are in the middle of a giant, dangerous racial conversation. It is not time to be silent.…
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My Mom Nearly Died by Suicide

Ever since that wiffleball game ended badly back in 1969 and I had to apologize to the scariest neighbor on the block for my bad language, my life has been filled with challenging conversations.  I happen to enjoy talking about the hard topics.  The ones we were trained to avoid—politics, sex and religion.  And I’d…
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“Dealing”with Difficult People in Covid Times

We all have difficult people in our lives.  Right now, for some of us, things are worse.  Since March of this year, most of us have had our regular lives turned upside down.  Dealing with difficult people in regular times is hard enough.  And now we have to deal with all this change and still…
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Make your Zoom meetings great with this insight!

Sure seems to be a lot of advice out there.   Seems like every email I get is from some business who is there for me “during Covid-19”.  Are you getting those?  Are they bothering you? Are you seeing lots of tips on having good zoom meetings?  How to get the lighting right.  How to get…
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I’m Worried About White Men

I’m worried about white men.  I know this is a risky thing to write. White middle-aged men in particular.  I know, you may think I’m a racist, or an ageist.  Or fomenting conflict.  From my point of view, I am genuinely worried about white-middle-aged men (and yes, in case you don’t know me, I’m also…
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Happy Thanksgiving Day

First I wish to express my gratitude to all those who have supported my work in 2019. It has been an exceptional year for me, both my regular consulting work as well as the “Fr. Vito” show that is going on its fourth year.   Your support, interest and care has really made a difference.   Thank you! As…
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How I caught a 44″ musky on the 1st cast!

Ten days ago I went fishing in northern Wisconsin with my son Elijah. He is just starting college and I wanted one last trip with him before the weather turned. On the first cast of the day I caught a 44” musky, the fish of 10,000 casts. What are the odds? Perhaps 1 in 10,000.…
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Throwing Mashed Potatoes at Them is Not the Answer

This Thanksgiving it is possible someone will make a comment about something other than the football game or the quality of the whipping cream on the pumpkin pie. Maybe even the recent election. This could be challenging. We are living in highly polarized times, and even the most skillful communicators are challenged when people who…
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This Is Not About Guns

This is not about guns. I do not know enough about guns to be an activist about guns. I do know about communication.  It is about people speaking up respectfully and effectively when something is awry.  This is my business. This is info about a confidential app to report warning signs of possible gun violence or…
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“MeToo” Movement

This is a tough article for me to write. I’ve been putting it off for a while and cannot put it off any longer. I’m nervous because I feel this is mostly a time for us men to listen. And I’m nervous that whatever I say here may be met by some with criticism.
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What Are You Doing?

With the holidays just around the corner I bet we’ll all have the chance to witness people doing things that seem odd to us — both at work and home. If we have forgiven them enough, and done enough of our inner work, can ask—with real curiosity and no anger — “What are you doing?”  We just might get some useful answers.
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Uber’s “Toxic” Culture

Uber is in trouble. After several years of incredible growth things are getting ugly. CEO Travis Kalanick has just announced he’s taking a leave of absence to work on himself and reflect on building a "world class leadership team" in the wake of reports pointing to his company’s toxic culture.
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