Articles by Tom Esch

These are things we are doing, with companies like yours, to help workers find ways to communicate effectively and respectfully in the midst of significant, interpersonal, racial, ethnic and gender-based differences. It is making a difference.

You can learn to be more direct and also still the completely nice person you are at your core. It is possible. It can be extra challenging when you work with people whose relatives come from countries other than Norway, Sweden and Germany, but the same basic principles apply.

So you are not getting along very well with that other person and your stress level is high. You have decided it is time for “The Bigga” conversation.  It takes incredible courage to even seriously consider it especially in conflict-reticent cultures.

So many people are talking about crucial conversations, courageous conversations, fierce conversations and constructive conversations. I am all for them. But there is also a time to NOT have that conversation.

Do you have unhelpful stress, caused by misunderstandings and challenges related to culture, race or positional power differences? We can help. Contact us via email or phone for a free consultation today.

I challenge you to make space for a variety of perspectives and to modulate the tendency to fight, flee, freeze or appease. I invite you to engage and not let your reptilian brain run the show. How do you do that?

When someone says “yes” that sounds like a “no” or a “maybe” I believe it is incumbent on the person making the request to gently press for their level of commitment to the request.  When they say a firm “no” it may be best to let go.

When you are at a meeting or a class and you are disengaged what is your usual response?

Where in your life could you benefit from intervening where others are acting in ways that create difficult situations?  How can you do it more skillfully?

One of things I have learned is that there is more to safety than simply doing what the manufacturer recommends.  Whatever tool you are using, following the safety guidelines is not enough anymore.

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When you know that you should say something and you don’t you may be inadvertently contributing to the problem at hand. Silence does not often help a situation that needs an interruption. And there are often costs associated with that lack of interruption. That is why it is expensive silence.